This is the time - Amelia part 2

This this song reminded me strongly of parts of Amelia's final email to me. She asked her mum to send it to me after she'd died, But her mum sent it to me a few days before so it wouldn't be forgotten in mourning once the machines were turned off (She was already unconscious at this time and not expected to regain consciousness). This is one little piece from Amelia's email to me,..."please remember that there is always someone to inspire and someone new to meet. But you have to be brave. Without my bravery of starting and Instagram account i would not have sister (you) and seven of my closest friends who have all played a role in my journey with AML (Leukaemia)." Amelia knew by this stage that I was ready to give up on the world again and that being in this world was a struggle but she strongly encouraged me to connect with people and showed me that connecting with people really does make a difference and had in her life.

She also talked about letting go of things that you didn't need to hold onto anymore and holding onto what WAS important... "I had to learn to let go. And letting go for me meant that i had to allow things to happen and accepting the present for what it is, although the shitty situation I was forced to accept it was all part of the process of letting go both emotionally and physically." and "For the longest time i wanted to control the situations and had the hardest time trying to let go. It can be hard to let go when tough things stand in your way but times come when you have to step back and let things happen". She encouraged me to move forward and not be afraid of things going wrong but to let go sometimes and just let it happens and other times you can fly.

So like the song says, you want to break apart the walls that set apart you from life whether it be pain, illness, anxiety, holding in trauma, do whatever it takes to let it go and step into life.

The other thing I learnt from the song that reminded me of Amelia so strongly was the notion of having dreams. Dreams are very important, hold onto them, develop them, step into them, don't let them go! Dreams will help you to FLY! 

There is a bridge in this song that goes, "Live like your life is worth dying for" and it is what Amelia taught me. I don't kinow why she had to die so young, I do not know why I'm alive because I think the world would be a better place if it was the opposite way around. But I work on not giving up and reaching out to my supports when I get low (I'm not crazy things don't just change overnight, no matter how much you decide you want them to)....but while I'm living this life I plan to live it worthy of Amelia my guardian angel and my friends and family who love me so much. 

This is the time - Superchick
This is the story of your life 
A movie starring you 
What's the next scene have for you to do? 

Leave the dishes in the sink
Leave your fear there too
Live the story you would write for you

Say hey hey wake your heart
And break break break apart
The walls that keep you from being you
And walk walk towards the light
And don't stop till you live your life
Like someone died for you

This is the time to try
Step out your life is waiting
And as you fall you'll find
That you can fly

This is the time to try
Step out your life is waiting
And as you fall you'll find
That you can fly

You can find a million words
To build a wall of fear
Safe behind that wall imprisoned here
Take that someday step today
To who you're meant to be
And turn your dreams to plans
So you can breathe

Say hey hey wake your heart
And break break break apart
The walls that keep you from being you
And walk walk towards the light
And don't stop till you live your life
Like someone died for you

This is the time to try
Step out your life is waiting
And as you fall you'll find
That you can fly

Ask anyone whose time is up
What they'd give for what you've got
And how they'd live your life
Live like your life's worth dying for
You've just walked out that prison door
And you'll know how to live your life

This is the time to try
Step out your life is waiting
And as you fall you'll find
That you can fly

This is the time to try
Step out your life is waiting
And as you fall you'll find
That you can fly